Singleness is used by God for sanctifying his children.
I have heard and seen many different blog posts or books written from the perspective of marriage being a sanctifying tool in the hands of God. More needs to be said about God’s use of singleness. Just like marriage (and any other season of life), God uses singleness to mold and shape his children the way he wants them to be.
During my years of singleness, God molded and shaped me in big ways. First, he continually brought me to a point of acceptance of his will. It’s hard to look at life and be willing to accept what God is doing . . . when he’s not doing what you want. Yet, this is what happened while I was single. God was keeping me single and bringing me to a point of saying, “Wherever you take me, I believe it will be best.” That is a HARD place to come to.
I also received practical experience with Romans 12:15. It felt like everyone I knew was announcing new relationships, engagements, marriages, and then pregnancies. All I wanted to do was engage in a pity party, and I did do that all too frequently. Yet, this verse came to mind, “Rejoice with those who rejoice.” I am called to rejoice with my friends as God works in their lives.
Acknowledging that God is at work even when it feels like he’s not. Again, this is hard. Emotionally, I frequently felt like God had forgotten me and was not working in my life. In contrast, he seemed to be working in the lives of my friends who were getting married. Yet, God is always at work in the lives of his people. It’s a matter of bringing my thoughts into line with the truth instead of allowing my emotions convince me of a falsehood. And it’s hard.
Yet all of these things worked in my life to bring me closer to God. Accepting his will, practicing Romans 12:15, and acknowledging God’s hand taught me lessons that will continue to benefit me throughout life.